Make Your Computer Greet You When You Use It

I noticed one day how rude my computer was to me. When I turned it on all it did was show the boot screen and then made me log in. When I logged in, expecting a welcome I just heard a logon sound. Well it isn't that impolite since the computer never knew I wanted it to do that but I still I would like it to have some manners. 

You will need.

A Windows 98 (or higher) Computer
Notepad (The program not the real thing)
5 minutes (unless your computer runs at a snail's pace)

First we need to open notepad to write the script.

Click Start>All Programs>Notepad

Now copy this into notepad...
Where it says user you can put your name.

Set Sapi = Wscript.CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice")

dim str

if hour(time) < 12 then
Sapi.speak "Good Morning User"
else
if hour(time) > 12 then
if hour(time) > 16 then
Sapi.speak "Good evening User"
else
Sapi.speak "Good afternoon User"
end if
end if
end if

Sapi.speak "The current time is "

if hour(time) > 12 then
Sapi.speak hour(time)-12
else
if hour(time) = 0 then
Sapi.speak "12"
else
Sapi.speak hour(time)
end if
end if


if minute(time) < 10 then
Sapi.speak "o"
if minute(time) < 1 then
Sapi.speak "clock"
else
Sapi.speak minute(time)
end if
else
Sapi.speak minute(time)
end if

if hour(time) > 12 then
Sapi.speak "P.M."
else
if hour(time) = 0 then
if minute(time) = 0 then
Sapi.speak "Midnight"
else
Sapi.speak "A.M."
end if
else
if hour(time) = 12 then
if minute(time) = 0 then
Sapi.speak "Noon"
else
Sapi.speak "P.M."
end if
else
Sapi.speak "A.M."
end if
end if
end if

This step is important. Make sure that you follow this carefully.

Name it something like welcome.vbs .

It can be named anything as long as you give it the .vbs file extension. 

Now click start and go to 

All Programs>Startup

Then drag the file to the startup folder.

Note: In Windows Vista and 7 (Not sure about others) This will only run in your user, unless you do the same thing on all users. 

Now restart your computer...

It should say good morning, evening, or afternoon and then the time.

Like always report any problems this program has to me.