The Spanker

Folks, do you know anyone who is unruly, misbehaving, or just needs a good ol' spanking? Well I have just the right tool for you. Speaking of having the right  tools, did you know that Techshop offers a great place for anyone who is looking to build, hack, or invent? This project right here was made using one of Techshop's most popular tools. Can you guess what it is?  If you said a laser engraver then you are correct!!!

In this Instructable, I will show you how to build your own spanker. You can customize your own or use the Corel Draw file provided if you happen to be in a hurry to spank someone or yourself.

For this project, I used 2 different colors of acrylic. Choose 2 of your favorite colors. I've seen similar types of spanking paddles sold online with just a single sheet 1/4" acrylic. We will be using 3 separate layers to provide more mass and a more rigid paddle. I advise against the single layer paddles since they do shatter if you spank someone hard enough. Practice safe spanking.

Materials:

1x 1/8" acrylic  15x6

1x 1/4" acrylic 15x6

Acrylic Cement

Tools:

Clamps

Laser Etcher

Here is the process I used to build this paddle. I chose Corel Draw since it was readily available. You folks can also use Adobe Illustrator to build your paddle.

The following photos will provide you with the steps I used. Scroll over the photos for steps.

After your design is complete, make sure you select "Hairline" in Corel Draw so that the laser knows which lines to cut out.

Here is the middle layer being cut out. This is the 1/8" piece. I leave the protective film on while I do my cuts.

Settings  for a 60w laser (your settings may vary)

Vector cut

Power 90
Speed 17
Freq. 5000

Here is the 1/4" layer being cut. We going to cut 2 pieces out of this. These will be the "bread" of our sandwich. Again, do not peel off protective film.

Settings for a 60w laser (your settings may vary)

Vector cut

Power 90
Speed 12
Freq. 5000

Here are the 3 pieces laid out. Now its time to stack them on top of each other with the thinnest layer (1/8") in the middle. Make sure the design lines up and just peel the protective film from the sides that are going to be glued on.

Now we can use the acrylic cement to glue our pieces together. I find that a paint brush is the best way to apply the acrylic cement. You can do 2 pieces at a time or all 3. Once aligned, clamp the pieces together. Wait for it to set for at least 15 min.

Another reason for not peeling the protective film on the outside parts of the paddle is that just in case you spill acrylic cement or get some on your fingers, it will protect the outside finish of your paddle. So just peel it off after the acrylic cement dries and you have yourself a finished paddle.

Enjoy and have yourself a spanking good time!!